batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
You pole danced in your parka.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
