So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
Randomize
