Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
