belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
