Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
