i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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