so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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