It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Alive.
So much puke
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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