Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
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