Theres a random in my bed. Omg but at least he's a law student?
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
