please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
