my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
