Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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