Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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