JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Randomize
