didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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