it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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