Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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