So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
Randomize
