I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
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