if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
Randomize
