Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize
