Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Randomize
