apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
