I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
