So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
