Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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