swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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