whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
