i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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