Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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