SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
it's great music for shaving your balls
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
