New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
