Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Randomize
