Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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