hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
