Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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