on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
My liver is preforming stress tests.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize