good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
