I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Everyone says I win the strip club
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
