So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
