I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
