Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
