I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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