Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
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