so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
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