Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
