My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize
