and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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