bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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